"I was focused on him academically while my husband pushed our son hard to reach his full potential in his music talent."
"They often come 'as a last resort' to see if they can make amends and repair their marriage."
They perceive that their main responsibilities are over and would like to consider spending the other half of their lives seeking new directions.
Legal issues in a grey divorce
"Some have said that they were waiting for their duty to the children to be over, like when the child graduates from university."
Increasing acceptance of grey divorce
"I've worked with several clients who have sought therapy for personal growth and realised that their marriage was a source of significant stress and emotional distress, leading them to prioritise their mental health and end the relationship."
"Also, increased financial independence, particularly among women, has provided older adults with the means to leave unsatisfactory relationships. This economic empowerment can make it easier for individuals to pursue personal happiness and well-being."
Why long-term marriages break down
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Empty Nest Syndrome
After children leave home, couples may find they have grown apart without the shared focus of parenting.
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Financial Stress:
Issues such as retirement planning, differing spending habits or financial instability can strain marriages.
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Infidelity:
Infidelity can severely damage trust and intimacy in a marriage, often leading to irreconcilable differences and a desire to separate.
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Midlife crisis/changes:
Midlife crises can prompt individuals to seek change and personal fulfilment, sometimes leading them to question their marital happiness and seek divorce. Chronic illnesses and caregiving responsibilities can place significant strain on the marriage, leading to frustration and burnout.
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Communication breakdown:
Over time, couples may lose effective communication skills, leading to misunderstandings and emotional distance.
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Growing apart:
Over the years, couples may find they have developed different interests, values or life goals. As individuals evolve, they may discover they no longer share core values or have compatible visions for their future, prompting a desire for independence and separate paths.
"However, it is also an opportunity for personal reinvention."
Rediscovering yourself after a grey divorce
"Cultivate a support network of friends and family, immerse yourself in activities that bring joy and consider working with a trusted professional, such as a psychologist or counsellor, to make sense of the loss and process any emotional baggage. Therapy can help you navigate your emotions and set new life goals."
"Focus on your physical and mental well-being. Accept that life may look different now and embrace the opportunities that come with a fresh start. Stay open to new experiences and possibilities."
