Summary:
- When Nani Hartini was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer, her husband Zafarudin Zahid stepped up as her caregiver, balancing his job, household duties, and taking care of her emotional well-being.
- The couple faced additional challenges when Zafarudin suffered a heart attack during her recovery, but they continued supporting each other with strength and understanding.
- Through their journey, they learned that love goes beyond caregiving. It’s about presence, patience, and keeping their partnership alive beyond illness.
"I wanted to be strong for her but I quickly realised how unprepared I was emotionally."
"My older son took me to the hospital. After having stent surgery, I was warded in hospital. Fortunately, my two sons were home to take care of my wife."
Making life less defined by breast cancer
"At home, I took on the chores, such as cooking and hanging clothes. My two sons also helped with household chores."
"Sitting beside her during treatments, holding her hand, or simply listening when she needs to vent."
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Balancing the roles of caregiver and husband
"Watching her deal with fatigue, hair loss, pain, and emotional ups and downs was one of the hardest parts for me as a husband. Still, she stayed strong, supported by me, my two sons, and close friends."
"Balancing being strong for her while also processing my own emotions was a real challenge."
So how did he manage the balance?
"Balancing the role of a caregiver and a husband when your wife is battling cancer can be both physically and emotionally exhausting, but also profoundly important."
"She either says yes or no."
"The journey feels overwhelming if you look too far ahead. Focus on getting through each appointment, each treatment, each day together."
"Don't lose your role as a partner. Hold hands, laugh together, share stories, and keep love alive beyond the illness."
"Your health and emotional well-being are important. If you’re exhausted or broken down, you can’t give your best support. Take breaks, rest, and talk to someone you trust."
"Be patient with their emotions, help them feel beautiful and valued. Also, celebrate with them and keep the partnership alive."
