Summary:
- In the author’s opinion, the Singaporean obsession with Johor Bahru is not just about cheaper goods and services, but also about the nostalgic, relaxed, “old Singapore” atmosphere that it still offers.
- Rising costs, limited space, and increasingly uniform malls in Singapore make JB’s food, wellness services, and leisurely environments especially appealing.
- The author humorously frames his growing JB habit as an addiction, reflecting how common and compelling these cross-border trips have become for many Singapore residents.
The vegetarian curry had just been served when my lunch was interrupted.
“Hey, Humphreys,” a voice said across the shopping mall.
I saw a stranger with a pack of 20 toilet rolls. Two packs in fact. One balanced on each shoulder. This guy didn’t belong in a shopping mall. He belonged in Cirque du Soleil. He was only missing a unicycle.
I’d never been greeted by a man juggling toilet rolls in a mall before. And that wasn’t even the strange bit.
I was having lunch at The Mall, Mid Valley Southkey in Johor Bahru. In Malaysia, Mid Valley Southkey is known as the largest mall in the southern part of West Malaysia. In Singapore, Mid Valley Southkey is known as “so much cheaper than Singapore”.
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If psychologists ever conducted a mass Rorschach test – that test where a set of ambiguous inkblots are held up to assess one’s personality – they’d only have to show a faint outline of the JB coastline and we’d all shout, “SO MUCH CHEAPER THAN SINGAPORE!”
Especially toilet rolls. And diapers, which the man’s wife was carrying. I was disappointed that their kids weren’t juggling boxes of wet wipes.
During our brief chat, I had so many questions, like, how did this guy know me? … How many toilet rolls can a man carry? … Did he have an irritable bowel?
The answers were… he worked with my wife in Singapore… About 40… And, no, they were just so much cheaper than Singapore. (You wouldn’t risk an irritable bowel for cheap JB toilet rolls. Not with that Causeway traffic.)
A Singaporean obsession with Johor Bahru
Our encounter was a few months ago now, but I’ve returned to JB several times since. In fact, I’ve visited twice in the last month. One more trip and I’ll be standing in front of a circle of sympathetic faces and saying, “my name is Neil Humphreys. And I am an addict. It’s been two weeks since my last Causeway Link bus. I was doing really well and then… I heard how cheap the Christmas chocolates were in Mid Valley.”
Half of Singapore would be in that circle. Taking turns to tell the addicts’ group how we’d succumbed to our JB vices of petrol pumping, car washing, makan, and massages – often in the same night.
It’s easy to scoff at those sitting in Causeway traffic at weekends, edging closer to their goal of saving $2 on a banana cake. Indeed, I was guilty of doing just that. Being the co-host of a Saturday morning radio show, I provide traffic updates every hour. I literally see the snarling traffic, in real time, and often poke fun at the futility of these penny-pinching shopping expeditions.
Or I did, until I became one of the many Singapore residents who collectively made more than 11 million trips across the Johor Straits in the first seven months of this year, according to the South China Morning Post.
With a growing income divide on our side of the Causeway, not to mention an ageing population with increasing medical costs, it’s easy to see why we might want cheaper health checks, dental clinics, wellness services, and massage parlours (where even the ‘special services’ are cheaper, or so I’ve heard anyway.)
Everything from a cut and blow dry to a squirt of Botox are available for Singaporeans with the magical ringgit. Have you ever experienced the magical ringgit? It’s like having Willy Wonka’s golden ticket in your wallet. Never mind an everlasting gobstopper, I’ve got everlasting ringgit. It never disappears. A wad of those notes is like that free-loading relative. No matter how much you hand out, it won’t go away.
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Not just about the exchange rates
But it’s more than just money, for me at least. I wouldn’t leave Singapore to save a few bucks on toilet rolls. But I would leave Singapore to visit old Singapore. The one that welcomed me back in 1996. No, this isn’t going to descend into a tiresome “in my day” diatribe about the Little Red Dot. I do not hanker for smelly longkangs, lifts that only stop at alternate floors, and non-air-conditioned buses.
But I do occasionally enjoy space and quiet and a chance to exhale in an air-conditioned environment, to eat local food at local prices without sweating or feeling like I’m taking part in the daily “chope table, eat fast and bugger off” eating challenge. In other words, JB can afford to bring traditional Singapore indoors, for a reasonable price.
Malaysian malls still have family-run eateries, banana leaf curries, and independent cafes selling local dishes for the price of a coffee in a Singaporean mall. Thanks to our ceaseless efforts to raise rents at every opportunity, this relaxed, kampong feel will not be a reality in our Identikit malls again. A banana leaf curry outlet could scarcely afford the rent, leaving Singapore with a dreary conveyor belt of F&B franchises.
During my latest visit to Mid Valley Southkey, I watched a gang of Singaporean aunties buy their groceries at the supermarket, examine their receipts (understandably) and check the latest exchange rates on their phones (naturally).
And then, they sat with drinks at a dining outlet beside the supermarket. They had the time, space, air-conditioning, and finances to spend all afternoon there. Where could they realistically do that in Singapore today?
JB is not just about the money. It’s also a chance to wallow in a little Southeast Asian nostalgia, to indulge in traditions, dishes, and even pastimes that are either beyond the budget or simply no longer available in Singapore. And what’s the harm in that?
So, yes, I am a JB addict. It has been one week since my last visit. And, honestly, my only regret is I didn’t bring back any toilet rolls.
