Singapore doesn’t do grey areas. We do the right thing, or we get fined.
Second, he went viral for his confusing demands. He ordered pedestrians not to “block the road”. It’s a strange request, as they were not pedestrians and there was no road.
At least the MBS cyclist didn’t use a bell. Quite often, angry cyclists ensure every tranquil walk through a park or nature reserve is disturbed by more bells than a Quasimodo recital.
Bemused monkeys must think the human mating call has evolved into three sharp trills of a bike bell and someone shouting, “please don’t block the road!” No wonder we’re breeding like pandas with a headache.
But at least I had my topic for this column. The fish were all lined up in the satirical barrel for shooting. Typical entitled behaviour in the post-Covid era. We’re all in our silos now, oblivious to everything but the echoes of our own voices.
No need to give way on a bicycle, or signal in a car, or even look up from a phone on a crowded MRT platform. It’s someone else’s job to accommodate our presence, space, and demands. The modern world merely exists to get out of our way.
That was going to be the subject matter. The entitlement. The selfishness. My Grandfather’s Road. The whole nine yards… until I became a version of the MBS cyclist. Gasp.
Just a week ago, I was cycling alongside Sungei Serangoon.
The stretch has been my regular run, jog, and now ride, for more than a decade, as my middle-aged knees inevitably made the switch from thirty-something urban athlete to fifty-something Sunday cyclist.
(I’ve already reached an agreement with my wife that she’ll leave me if I ever utter the words, “I think my nether regions will look better in Lycra shorts.”)
But the park connector was congested when I encountered that jogger. You know that jogger. You have met that jogger. He or she is fully aware that the far-sighted folks at the Land Transport Authority and National Parks Board have come together to provide that jogger with a special lane.
As this is Singapore, the lane is even marked out with painted dividers and stencilled characters. The lane is designed for the regular jogger.
But that jogger isn’t a regular jogger. That jogger is the kid who pushes his bowl of porridge aside and says, “I want that one”, and shoves both hands into mummy’s prawns.
Because that jogger wants to run in the cycling lane. Because clearly the visual cues are not sufficient. You know, the signs on the lampposts, the stencils on the path and a hundred cyclists ringing their bells.
That jogger was just ahead of me. In the cycling lane. But I did not speak. Instead, I rang my bell a couple of times. And I pointed my left index finger to my right, towards the other lane, the one with all the cyclists, and moved on.
And then, that jogger shouted at me. His voice was indignant, but certain. So he was selfish and deluded, I thought to myself, as I pedalled away. And then I spotted the sign… shared path. Shared lanes for runners and cyclists. But only on the left side. Our side.
The internal questions came quickly: When did that happen? Which part of the park connector is a shared path? How much of it is shared? Was it shared before, during, or after I rang my bell?
Because it definitely wasn’t shared before. For almost 10 years, cyclists pretty much stayed to the left and joggers and walkers stayed on the right.
Now we’ve got separate bits and shared bits along Sungei Serangoon, turning us all into schizophrenic introvert-extroverts. I can be alone. Then I can join others. Then I can be alone again.
As always, the changes are well meaning. Since July 1, our governing powers have painted the towns red (with their cycling paths) and announced stricter laws for those riding on designated pedestrian-only footpaths – and rightly so.
The park connectors and pathways are getting congested as we facilitate greener, healthier travel options.
But first-time offenders convicted of riding on a pedestrian-only path can be fined up to $2,000 or jailed for up to three months, or both. One minute, I can be smugly ringing my bell at that jogger; the next, I’m doing time at Changi.
As I said, the idea is laudable. Safety trumps all other considerations. But let’s be honest, the law changes aren’t really for me or you. They’re for That Delivery Guy. Again, we’ve all met That Delivery Guy.
While I’m debating whether a 50m stretch of park connector is a shared path or not, he’s already mounted the kerb, dropped into oncoming traffic, swerved across three lanes, zigzagged through pedestrians at the crossing and exited at the bus stop.
A spectacular manoeuvre made all the more impressive as he was holding the handlebars with just one hand and chain-smoking with the other.
Seriously, I applaud the law changes, the red cycling lanes, and even the heavy fines. Reckless and entitled driving and riding, on any vehicle, needs to be monitored and punished accordingly. But do give us all a little time to make adjustments to the lane changes.
Innocent mistakes and occasional lane mix-ups will happen. With a little patience and tolerance for our fellow path users, we’ll get there. In my neighbourhood, the road to Hougang is paved with good intentions.
To Be Or Not To Be On A Cycling Path? That Is The Confusing Singapore Question
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Cycling or jogging path?
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Neil Humphreys
Neil Humphreys is an award-winning writer and the best-selling author of 30 books in Singapore. He’s also a radio host, a podcaster, a public speaker and the proud owner of a head of silver hair.
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